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battysketches:

"I GOT THIS BIG D DONT WORRY—"

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for the freshmen invasion weeee

thewritingcafe:

BASICS:

Genres:

  • Alternate World: A setting that is not our world, but may be similar. This includes “portal fantasies” in which characters find an alternative world through their own. An example would be The Chronicles of Narnia.
  • Arabian: Fantasy that is based on the Middle East and North Africa.
  • Arthurian: Set in Camelot and deals with Arthurian mythology and legends.
  • Bangsian: Set in the afterlife or deals heavily with the afterlife. It most often deals with famous and historical people as characters. An example could be The Lovely Bones.
  • Celtic: Fantasy that is based on the Celtic people, most often the Irish.
  • Christian: This genre has Christian themes and elements.
  • Classical: Based on Roman and Greek myths.
  • Contemporary: This genre takes place in modern society in which paranormal and magical creatures live among us. An example would be the Harry Potter series.
  • Dark: This genre combines fantasy and horror elements. The tone or feel of dark fantasy is often gloomy, bleak, and gothic.
  • Epic: This genre is long and, as the name says, epic. Epic is similar to high fantasy, but has more importance, meaning, or depth. Epic fantasy is most often in a medieval setting.
  • Gaslamp: Also known as gaslight, this genre has a Victorian or Edwardian setting.
  • Gunpowder: Gunpowder crosses epic or high fantasy with “rifles and railroads”, but the technology remains realistic unlike the similar genre of steampunk.
  • Heroic: Centers on one or more heroes who start out as humble, unlikely heroes thrown into a plot that challenges them.
  • High: This is considered the “classic” fantasy genre. High fantasy contains the general fantasy elements and is set in a fictional world.
  • Historical: The setting in this genre is any time period within our world that has fantasy elements added.
  • Medieval: Set between ancient times and the industrial era. Often set in Europe and involves knights. (medieval references)
  • Mythic: Fantasy involving or based on myths, folklore, and fairy tales.
  • Portal: Involves a portal, doorway, or other entryway that leads the protagonist from the “normal world” to the “magical world”.
  • Quest: As the name suggests, the protagonist in this genre sets out on a quest. The protagonist most frequently searches for an object of importance and returns home with it.
  • Sword and Sorcery: Pseudomedieval settings in which the characters use swords and engage in action-packed plots. Magic is also an element, as is romance.
  • Urban: Has a modern or urban setting in which magic and paranormal creatures exist, often in secret.
  • Wuxia: A genre in which the protagonist learns a martial art and follows a code. This genre is popular in Chinese speaking areas.

Word Counts:

Word counts for fantasy are longer than other genres because of the need for world building. Even in fantasy that takes place in our world, there is a need for the introduction of the fantasy aspect.

Word counts for established authors with a fan base can run higher because publishers are willing to take a higher chance on those authors. First-time authors (who have little to no fan base) will most likely not publish a longer book through traditional publishing. Established authors may also have better luck with publishing a novel far shorter than that genre’s expected or desired word count, though first-time authors may achieve this as well.

A general rule of thumb for first-time authors is to stay under 100k and probably under 110k for fantasy.

Other exceptions to word count guidelines would be for short fiction (novellas, novelettes, short stories, etc.) and that one great author who shows up every few years with a perfect 200k manuscript.

But why are there word count guidelines? For young readers, it’s pretty obvious why books should be shorter. For other age groups, it comes down to the editor’s preference, shelf space in book stores, and the cost of publishing a book. The bigger the book, the more expensive it is to publish.

  • General Fantasy: 75k - 110k
  • Epic Fantasy: 90k - 120k
  • Contemporary Fantasy: 90k - 120k
  • Urban Fantasy: 80k - 100k
  • Middle Grade: 45k - 70k
  • YA: 75k - 120k (depending on sub-genre)
  • Adult: 80k - 120k (depending on sub-genre)

WORLD BUILDING:

A pseudo-European medieval setting is fine, but it’s overdone. And it’s always full of white men and white women in disguise as white men because around 85% (ignore my guess/exaggeration, I only put it there for emphasis) of fantasy writers seem to have trouble letting go of patriarchal societies. 

Guys. It’s fantasy. You can do whatever you want. You can write a fantasy that takes place in a jungle. Or in a desert. Or in a prairie. The people can be extremely diverse in one region and less diverse in another. The cultures should differ. Different voices should be heard. Queer people exist. People of color exist. Not everyone has two arms or two legs or the ability to hear.

As for the fantasy elements, you also make up the rules. Don’t go searching around about how a certain magic spell is done, just make it up. Magic can be whatever color you want. It can be no color at all. You can use as much or as little magic as you want.

Keep track of what you put into your world and stick to the rules. There should be limits, laws, cultures, climates, disputes, and everything else that exists in our world. However, you don’t have to go over every subject when writing your story.

World Building:

Cliches:

Note: Species (like elves and dwarves) are not cliches. The way they are executed are cliches.

CHARACTERS

Read More

How to, like, write cover letters and resumes and know what jobs to apply to and shit.

randumcharacter:

morgulblade:

Basically I have been blessed to be close to people who work in hiring and were very, very willing to pass along their knowledge and tips and since a lot of people I know on here seem mystified by these things, I will share my vast wealth of knowledge with you*

*Some of this knowledge might be contradicted by specifics from your own field. If you’re a chemical engineer some of these things might not apply and that’s fine. This is just ~*widely applicable*~ stuff.

Cover Letters

Cover letters are the stupidest part of a job application. The cover letter is really only there to show two things: 1) That you have a command of language that is both accurate and appropriate; 2) you read the job listing.

  • Your cover letter should be short. The hirer has likely read hundreds that day, and by read, I mean “skimmed over lightly.” You don’t need to fill up an entire page. 
  • It should only contain pertinent information. Do not try to be cutesy or “creative” unless the job listing SPECIFICALLY asks for that. Trust me, I’ve had to hire people. Those people’s letters got passed around for mocking. DO NOT BE THAT PERSON.
  • It should speak to the job listing, but only enough that it shows that you read it. If the job listing emphasizes that they’re looking for somebody who is willing to work odd hours, throw in a line that in your past experience you have been noted for being flexible with time. It doesn’t need a Faulkner-length explanation.
  • If you know the name of the person to whom the letter is addressed, address it to them. If you it is a blind application, you don’t need to put “To Whom It May Concern” or “Dear Sir/Madam;” just don’t say anything.
  • Stop freaking out about it. Seriously, your CL is not nearly as scary as you think it is. If you want to see a screenshot if an example cover letter that is a “catch all,” click here. I just pulled this out of my ass for a fictional job/person.

Resumes

Your resume is not an “employment record.” Unless you have no experience, it should only list the things that are the most impressive or demonstrate your abilities the clearest. 

  • If you have an “Objective” on your resume, take it off. All of the employers I know said, “We KNOW your objective—you want the job! It just takes up space.” 
  • Always make sure that your resume is formatted cleanly and with maximum readability in mind. I strongly, strongly suggest visiting this link to see how to format your resume best. Visual cleanliness matters. 
  • Your resume should be ONE page. Just one. Not two or more
  • You can’t lie on your resume; you can learn how to make things sound more impressive. If you worked at a hair salon cleaning up, don’t say “Swept floors.” Instead write, “Contributed to the efficiency and cleanliness of the salon by sweeping floors.” It sounds like bullshit to you, but to a prospective employer, it sounds like you’re happy being part of a team. Try to describe what you did in at least 7 words.
  • You can divide your resume if you want to highlight certain experiences over others. Making two sections such as “Relevant Experience” and “Other Experience” breaks it up, allows the reader to skip around, and let’s you highlight what you want to highlight.
  • Learn to weed things out. Unless you can make it look like it taught you something huge, don’t waste the space. At the same time, if a job sucked but you can make it appear like it really impacted you, use it. This is not the truth about how you felt about that last job. This is you advertising yourself. You’re trying to get a job, not a Nobel Prize for emotional honesty. 
Now, what about the Skills section? You should have one, but as one friend said, “Nobody gives a shit if you went to France and had a great time. What we care about is if you’re proficient in French.” That should be your metric for things:
  • Only list experiences that would aid you in this job or a similar one—not things that were “cool.” This is the place for things that you’ve learned but perhaps can’t tie to a job. Examples: foreign language skills, clerical training, courses/certifications, etc. 
  • List all of the software that you know. Even if it doesn’t seem relevant to that job, weird things happen. List any MS Office/equivalent software, if you are familiar with both Mac and PC, any graphics editing software you know… 
  • SOCIAL MEDIA IS A THING THAT YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY MAKE KNOWN. To people ~30 and under, social media seems like a given. But to many employers, it’s a mystical world filled with equal amounts of marketing opportunities and terror. Make it clear what social networking sites you know how to use—obviously Facebook and Twitter, but also LinkedIn, Pinterest, Tumblr, etc. 

Applying to Jobs/Interviewing

Unfortunately, I can give you less specific advice here because we are not likely working in the same field—but here are just some general things to file away:

  • If there’s a job listing that you feel qualified for but the listing says it wants more years of experience than you have, apply anyway. Those employers are unlikely to find that unicorn that has 4+ years of experience and is willing to work basically minimum wage. While more experience is a plus, they really just want somebody who can do the job. When it comes to applying to jobs, you really have nothing to lose by applying to anything that tickles your fancy
  • Interviewing is an entire post unto itself, but I’ll give you the tips that I’ve been given by my people: be calm, be on time, and ask good questions. Always have some questions lined up, even if you already know the answer. “What are you looking for in the right candidate?” is a good example, or “Are there opportunities for growth within the company?” etc. 

Accepting a Job

So you got a job offer; exciting! Before you immediately accept, really vet the place to make sure it’s somewhere you’d like to work. Months of unemployment make you desperate, but sometimes jumping at the first opportunity it isn’t worth it. THIS HAPPENED TO ME, LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES

Things you should think about:

  • Do I know ALL things about the job, including: what I will be paid/how often, if there are benefits and when I get them, what hours I am working, how overtime is handled, how sick time is handled, etc. These are all incredibly important to know and if your employer is legitimate they will welcome you asking them. 
  • Is the distance commutable, or is it too far from home? (Think about how transit/gasoline will cut into your paycheck.)
  • Does the job give me the time necessary to do other important things?
  • Does the office environment seem like one I can spend at least six months in? (Every month at a bad job feels like an eternity—if you have bad feelings, trust them.) 
  • Does the job offer me anything besides a paycheck? Will I be learning any skills at this job or making important connections that can help me down the road?
IMPORTANT: If an employer tries to give you a W-9 tax form upon your hiring and you are NOT a freelancer (independent contractor), RUN. This is tax fraud and is very messy and is entirely there to screw you. Become familiar with the legal definition of a freelancer so you know if you’re walking into a shady place. It happens more than you’d think, and it sucks, and is weird.
If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message or whatever, I’ll gladly answer to the best of my ability! GO GET ‘EM. 

Vital information for your everyday life. 

justcallmesushi:

"We’re learning a lot about this thing called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This war time disease. This combat fatigue diagnosis. And we read something worth sharing. Fact, urban youth are twice as likely to get Post Traumatic Stress Disorder than soldiers who are coming home from war. So tell me, what’s the difference between homicide in the streets and bloodshed on the battlefields of Iraq. […] The only difference there is between a soldier with PTSD and one of my students with it is that a soldier gets to leave the battlefield, while my kids go home to it."

Javon Johnson & Terisa Siagatonu- “PTSD”

star-anise:

So some dudes were complaining lately, “Women are telling guys to stop telling them how to dress, but not all guys are total misogynists!  Women do it to each other too!”

So. People.  Let me tell you a thing.

This is a picture of a panopticon. It’s a kind of prison.  See, it’s a giant circle, with all the cells around the rim.  The tower in the middle is where the guards are.  The guards can see into all the prisoners’ cells, but the prisoners cannot see each other, and they have difficulty seeing the guards.  Each prisoner knows that at any time, they are being watched, and if the guards see them behaving incorrectly, they will come with truncheons and beat the prisoner up.  They learn to feel that gaze on them, all the time; every movement makes them think, “What if this breaks the rules, and they see, and they come and punish me?”  Soon, prisoners don’t need guards standing over them all the time to follow the rules; they do it themselves, because that gaze is omnipresent.  Even when the guard house is empty, they still think, “What if someone is watching me?”  (This is all from Michel Foucault.  You want more on this, go read Discipline and Punish, enjoy the descriptions of medieval torture.)

The panopticon is a metaphor.  In our society, we are constantly watched, tracked, disciplined, and punished, from childhood. The school says you skipped class today.  The babysitter says you wouldn’t follow the rules.  The police saw you at the park with your friends.  We are held to valid rules, and to bullshit rules; some of them are necessary to make our society safe, and some of them just make us easier to exploit.

You are held to rules.  I am held to rules.  They vary.  As a woman, I am held to rules that say be small be pretty defer to someone else and I’m punished in different ways if I don’t obey.  My brother is held to different rules, that say be strong don’t feel dominate the situation.  We end up policing each other; we meet and he says, “Looking good,” and I remember: people are watching how I dress and how I look.  If I disobey, they will notice, and I could be punished.  I meet him after his job and ask, “Do you think you’ll be promoted soon?” and he remembers: people pay attention to whether or not I’m in charge, and if I’m not dominant, I could be punished.

Sometimes the guardhouse is empty.  Sometimes nobody is paying close attention to what I’m wearing.  Sometimes the guards don’t come to punish me, so whether or not I am pretty or attractive does not affect whether I get to own property.  (It used to: whether or not my ancestresses were married affected their legal and economic statuses hugely)

Feminism is about the work of dismantling the prison when it comes to bullshit rules.  It’s about saying that we shouldn’t be held to stupid rules based on gender.  So it’s about the work of getting rid of the cells and the watchtower, and getting rid of the guards with truncheons.  We can stop telling each other these stories about all the rules we’re held to, and we can stop punishing each other for breaking them.  My brother stops telling me, “You’ll never get a date if you dress like that.”  I stop telling him, “You need to be strong and work hard so you come out on top.”

So no, feminists don’t believe that all men everywhere are 100% misogynistic.  It’s just that a lot of women are conditioned to think that 100% of the time, there is a risk that someone is watching us, and we will be punished if the break the rules.  It is really hard work to break the social structures and the internal attitudes that imprison us.

And yes, women can enforce the panopticon.  Hell, I’ll even tell you a womanly secret: I cannot count the number of times I’ve received cruelty at the hands of fellow girls for the way I looked or dressed.  My entire middle school experience was basically that and algebra. We’re working on fixing that!  Please, do not doubt that we’ve been working on that among ourselves as a gender.  Women have spent a lot of blood, sweat, and tears trying to change how we treat each other.  Now we’re asking you to pitch in.

piecestopuzzle:

shipthenerd:

ginkgobilobas:

captain-snark:

electricjuicebox:

weshoulddrinkfirst:

drummajorisyourfandomready:

eyesslightlyopened:

allthingswittyandneko:

eyesslightlyopened:

scrake:

womenagainstfeminism:

allthingswittyandneko:

Feminist logic.

"Stop objectifying me!!"

OHHOHOOOOO MY GOD BECAUSE WOMEN WEAR CLOTHES PURELY FOR OTHER PEOPLE AND NOT FOR THEMSELVES RIGHT??

Because all men have the brains of peas and if they have breasts in front of them THEY HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO STOP EVERYTHING AND LOOK. AND NOT STOP LOOKING. AND FORGET THAT THE WOMAN EVEN EXISTS.

Thanks for clearing it up. You see, I thought men were competent human beings ^_____^

Why do you wear a shirt that low cut, or a tube top, or shortshorts with “juicy” written across the ass, if you don’t want men to look at it?

Maybe because I like dressing like that. Maybe its hot outside and I want to let everything out.

Or maybe im a LESBIAN and want WOMEN to look at me ^_____^

fucking hell is it really that foreign a concept that maybe women wear things for THEMSELVES

EVEN IF SHE’S WEARING THE SHIRT IN ORDER TO BE LOOKED AT AND FOUND SEXUALLY APPEALING 

THAT DOESN’T MEAN SHE WANTS TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH A PERSON WHO IS NOT ACKNOWLEDGING HER WORDS AND IS SOLELY ACKNOWLEDGING HER BREASTS

holy shit i don’t know why this is such a difficult concept to grasp

do women ever dress sexy because they want people to look at them? YES OF COURSE THEY DO
but that doesn’t mean they ONLY want to be found sexy

you might not have noticed, but women are multi-faceted people
it’s not too much to ask for someone to admire my cleavage and then have a conversation with me in which they treat me like a human being and look me in the eyes while i speak

That last comment, though.

Also, just because women wear something to be found sexually appealing by others doesn’t mean they are dressed that way to be found sexually appealing BY EVERY SINGLE PERSON THEY COME INTO CONTACT WITH.

Just because they wear something provocative so that attractive man with the nice eyes and smile who chats them up and who is charming and interested in who she is can find her sexually appealing doesn’t mean jackasses who think they’ve got a ticket to the free boob show are OWED her time and body because of it. 

like the fuck. Let’s play a really awful logic game here and say you bake a dozen cupcakes and you baked them for the hell of it, you LIKE baking, and damn those cupcakes taste good. So you bring them out with you cos you have some friends that would also LOVE these cupcakes. 

ANd on the way there some asshole just comes up to you and EATS a cupcake, just swipes it right off the fuckin plate. YOu’d be like what the fuck bro. “Oh I’m sorry weren’t these cupcakes meant to be EATIN?”

"Yes.."

"WELL THEN YOU CAN’T BLAME ME FOR EATING THEM THEN CAN YOU???"

"YES YOU FUCKTRUCK COS IT’S MY CUPCAKE AND MY CHOICE WHO I SHARE MY DAMN CUPCAKES WITH. WHAT IS THIS LIKE FUCKIN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. I DO NOT HAVE TO SHARE THE BREASTS WITH EVERY ONE IN THE CLASS, THAT IS NOT HOW THAT WORKS."

I like that the concept of women simultaneously wanting to be attractive and treated like a person says loads about the way how men instinctively dehumanize women with sexual agency. It’s like, if a woman is sexually attractive - or worse, if a woman is sexually attractive and knows it - they lose the right to be treated as a person, they’re an object, and you can’t blame men for treating them like that. And it’s really creepy yo

TRUTH

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